Friday, January 20, 2017

Pillow Talk: Confidence vs Arrogance


These days, I'm so grateful I've got to meet a lot of new people from many different backgrounds in every events I attend. And sometimes I'm still surprised to meet people with their cockiness. We all know people who sing their own praises or social opportunity, even they often praise themselves in their own social media.

For my whole life, I tried to build my self-confidence, and I realize when I finally ACCEPT the way I am, inside and out, that's finally how I feel confident. So, of course, to be honest, I never understand why some people likes to brag about themselves everywhere, so out of my curiosity I did some research about this arrogance thing and find out the simple fact about it.


Confidence = Self-Acceptance
Arrogance= Ego and Insecurities


Yes, as simple as that. It sounds crazy, the first time I hear it, because there's no way they feel insecure when they keep bragging all the time. But, the more I pay attention to their behavior, it makes more sense. Arrogant people usually view themselves as superior and never admit their mistakes. They even treat others as junior, and they see themselves above others, it's all because of their ego and deep down inside they feel insecurities. Here are some differences or fine line between Confidence vs Arrogance;


1. Condescending Remarks 

Arrogant people are single minded; they either think that they are superior to others or inferior to them. This arrogance may be nothing more than a way to cover the feelings of "feel small" they experience when dealing with someone else. They feel better when they tears others down. I think it's truly a sick feeling to see that behavior, because I feel allergic to people who always think they're superior and better than everyone. Wake up! There's always people who's better than us, and we should never stop learning. 

On the contrary, confident people are high minded, because they can feel good without having a desire to offend or even hurt others. They don't feel the need to brag. They usually see other people's potential and can help them succeed in something.  


2. Active Listening vs Monologue


Arrogant and confident people treat others in a different way. An arrogant person thinks they are better than others, while a confident person knows they are just as good as others. 


Confident people will rarely be found lecturing to others or how they are wrong. They usually show respect while listening to somebody. Arrogant people have difficulty listening to others/ They often exude negative energy and blame others if things do not work out as expected.


3. Ambition vs Ruthlessness


Ambition is not a crime. Confident people enjoy achievement and contributing their talents to the world. They don't feel threatened by others' successes and instead try to LEARN from them. 


Cocky people need to believe that they are on top even if reality says otherwise. This can lead to unnecessarily manipulative behavior as they focus on defending a power base at all costs.


4. Self-perception


Confident people always feel comfortable, because they have the right conception of perfection. It seems impossible to bring them down, because they are aware of their weaknesses and know how to deal with them. Meanwhile, arrogant people brush their own weaknesses aside and cannot admit their mistakes.


5. Communication


Of course, it's not a pleasant thing to communicate with this kind of people. An arrogant person will always try to one-up everything you say. They mind only their own position and make others accept their ideas. That's why people try to avoid their conversations with them because it's not comfortable to speak with the person who is always right. Yes, ma'am lol.


Confident people ADMITS lack of knowledge and they don't try to impose their vision of the situation on others. Their accomplishments do it for them.


6. The Human vs The Greek God

According to psychcentral.com, as a self-confident person, you accept that you are just a human being. You are intrinsically no better or worse than anyone else. You accept who you really are, you have flaws, failures and really bad hair days. You treat yourself with compassion while taking responsibility for your choices, and you learn from misfortune and mistakes. 

Arrogant people can't risk the fragile image in the face of the defeat and run from criticism. They tend to go extremes of either deflecting blame onto others or condemning themselves for being only human. 

Truly secure people evaluate their own behavior and fave their doubts. By letting go of fear, you set yourself up for success.

7. The Origins


Arrogance is usually the result of a defense mechanism used by subconscious mind in order to prevent further criticism. Confidence comes from positivity, optimism and mental steadiness.

Well, that's it. I think it's important to understand the differences or the fine line between arrogance and confidence. Because no one likes to deal with arrogant people. This article is also for myself, so I always remember to stay grounded, yet confident. Try to be confident, because everyone wants to hang around people who feel secure and positive. No one wants to hang around cocky persons. Have you ever dealt with an arrogant person? Can you tell the difference between arrogance and confidence?

Source:

http://psychcentral.com/blog/archives/2012/12/26/the-fine-line-between-self-confidence-cockiness/

http://womanitely.com/ways-difference-arrogant-confident/



xoxo, bee 

12 comments:

  1. Wonderful post! Staying grounded and confident is so important. I think if we accept ourselves with all our flaws, we can connect with others with confidence. Thank you for an inspiring post!

    http://www.kathrineeldridge.com

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you so much for your kind words dear, I'm so glad we're in the same page 😊

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  2. Thanks for this very interesting post!
    I guess I need more confidence. I am not arrogant but I am really selfish and sincerely I am not sure how to be more confident.
    xx

    www.sakuranko.com

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I'm so glad you like this dear, hopefully this article will reminds you to love yourself more 😊

      Delete
  3. topiknya bagus ce bitha XD aku gak yakin sih aku terkategori yang mana, tapi aku jadi tau kalo mau lebih percaya diri i should try to love myself 😄😄

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Sama2 Vini, I'm so glad you think that way ☺️☺️ Semoga bisa makin pede ya 😘😘

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  4. I read seerious talk in here ce...
    kalau aku sepertinya arrogance deh. LOL

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. So surprised you think like that yu 😳 because for me kamu salah satu org yg baik dan rendah hati yg kukenal 😇

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  5. Love this part, "An arrogant person will always try to one-up everything you say. They mind only their own position and make others accept their ideas. That's why people try to avoid their conversations with them because it's not comfortable to speak with the person who is always right. Yes, ma'am lol.

    Confident people ADMITS lack of knowledge and they don't try to impose their vision of the situation on others. Their accomplishments do it for them."

    thank you for sharing

    ReplyDelete
  6. I really like your article. You are so right. There is a fine line between confidence and arrogance and I like the way you described it!
    X
    Miri

    http://currentlywearing.com

    ReplyDelete
  7. A very interesting topic to address babe! I think there can be a fine line between the two for sure! You definitely don't want arrogant people in your life. I have definitely encounter my share of arrogant people in my life.

    xoxo Rina Samantha
    http://www.andshedressed.com

    ReplyDelete

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